Bye, Bye Anxiety

Does anxiety control you? Are you stuck living with anxiety? Do you tell yourself “there is no way out“?

Well, there is a way out. Anxiety is a vicious friend, but a friend nonetheless. Anxiety tells you when you need to make a life change. Anxiety is the emotion that tells you that something is not right in your life and you need to change it – – a career change, a relationship change, an environment change, a thinking change, a goal change.

You have the power within you to literally “will “anxiety away.

Steps to eliminating anxiety:

1.) Figure out what thoughts are causing your anxiety.

2.) Replace negative, unproductive thoughts with positive, productive thoughts.

3.) Take deep breaths.

4.) Exercise every action with integrity. You would be surprise the number of people who experience depression and anxiety because they are not exercising good character. Anxiety and depression are ways that the subconscious lets you know that you are not being your best self.

5.) Focus on successful thinking.

6.) Do no harm to others. Be grateful. Be selfless. Don’t be selfish.

7.) Remove toxic people, thoughts, habits from your life.

8.) Remove negative behaviors from your life such as:

Binge/comfort eating

Excessive sleeping/lethargy

Excessive entertainment

Excessive sex/promiscuity

Excessive shopping/spending money


Substance abuse

Depressing thoughts

Angry thoughts

Procrastinating thoughts

Prejudiced thoughts

Envious thoughts

Jealous thoughts

Resentful thoughts


Blaming others

Blaming life

Guilting self or others

9.) Replace with positive behaviors, thoughts, habits:

Exercise daily (at least 15 minutes)

Eat healthy

Research healthy strategies

Self-educate on self-help topics


In what ways are you coping negatively?

What are positive ways you can cope?

Are you ready to replace your negative coping with positive coping?

Are you willing to practice positive coping?

It is important to get to the underlying issue of your negative coping. Negative coping and negative thoughts are symptoms of unresolved emotional trauma.

Last, how is avoidance and denial counterproductive to positive mental health?

Male Vulnerability: Is It a Weakness or a Strength?

Dai Manuel guest-hosts with Heather Blackwell to discuss the topic of ‘vulnerability’ as it relates to strength of character, interdependence, a cohesive self-identity, and a productive/holistically-rewarding life experience. To learn more about Dai Manuel’s Men’s Empowerment group, contact Dai via Instagram @daimanuel. Also check out Dai’s website at

Check out these audio clips from my convo with Tedx Speaker, Dai Manuel! 😀

To hear the entire conversation, click here.

Mental Health: What is Your Status?

The picture above is me when I was 21 and now when I’m 43. A lot has happened since then.

Mental health is important to harness. Mental unhealth is a struggle and a reality. Becoming mentally healthy is a choice; this is also a reality. Mental health can be obtained via self-education/self-help/lifestyle changes…very rarely is medication needed.

Mentally healthy people have a choice and a right not to share company with those who are mentally unhealthy; those who are unhealthy can drag down those close to them who are healthy and this is called ‘codependency’.

Oftentimes, those who are mentally unhealthy must walk their journey alone until they become mentally healthy. Once a mentally unhealthy person becomes mentally healthy then he or she can become a productive member of society and work to educate society on how to become mentally healthy.

I was born into a mentally unhealthy family who created mental unwellness in me and as a young adult, I subconsciously gravitated toward those who were mentally unhealthy, because I subconsciously sought out those who reflected the maladaptive tendencies of my family members. In my late 20’s, I realized that my mental unwellness was a maladaptive behavioral pattern resulting from childhood trauma and so I began a self-help journey to reverse the damaging effects of living among my family members throughout my formative years. For years, I walked alone in my journey (secretly I called myself ‘Bruce Banner’).

I allowed no one into my inner circle while I studied and practiced mentally healthy behaviors. By age 36-40, I became mentally healthy. Now, I incorporate mentally healthy people into my life. I educate others on how to become mentally healthy. Personal and civic responsibility are important to consider. It is a ‘victim mentality’ to expect anyone mentally healthy to suffer the abuses of the mentally unhealthy, which is much like a drowning person trying to save him/her self by clinging to those who can stay afloat.

There are mental health professionals (MHP), self-help books, and educational information available for those who need and seek advisement for self-improvement.

Don’t drown others in an attempt to save yourself. Contact a MHP to learn how to save yourself.

New Podcast Episode!

Have you ever wondered what it means to have a personality disorder? Are you familiar with the term ‘codependency’?

Join Jeff and me as we have a candid conversation about personality disorders, personality traits, codependency, and specific healing techniques for…all of the above.

This episode is jam-packed with therapeutic information sure to help heal any degree of wounded psyche.

If you have considered starting a self-help journey, or if you wonder what that means, then check out this clarifying episode!